Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6 CSB
Let’s Examine Self-Focused Prayer
Praying for one’s self is very important. We must continuously lean on the Lord in prayer than we may live a life that honors him and to ask him for what we need. Here I want to expand on prayer so that it is not just about ourselves. It is good to look introspectively and evaluate how often we pray for ourselves and how often we pray for others.
Two extremes can be found here: praying only about yourself and praying only for others. You can most definitely neglect yourself in prayer. I’m not presenting you with any set formula and I am not arguing that it is one versus the other, but there is a balance to be found here and something profound that we should know. We never pray alone. Even the Holy Spirit is praying on our behalf (Romans 8:26). My goal is to encourage everyone who believes to pray more overall and not just about self, but for others as well and to not be afraid to ask others for prayer.
If you do fear perhaps that the majority of your prayer is self-focused, this is not a horrible thing. I want to encourage you to expand on what and whom you pray for. Ask others how you can be praying for them. If you have trouble remembering what they tell you don’t feel bad about taking notes. If someone asks you this question give a real reply and be sure to ask them the same question back. These conversations not only cause your prayer life to grow, but your relationships with others will grow also.
In my own prayer life I have found a balance by writing in a prayer journal and praying as I go about my day. Most of my written prayers are centered on me and some are about others. While in everyday life, I find I pray more in the moment for other people than myself. Some days it’s about an angry cashier at the grocery store I see who needs more strength just to get through another day or a group of construction workers who’s safety is often at great risk (I’ve seen my fair share of construction work related injuries come into the ER).
Another possible sign of a more self-centric prayer life is being overly consumed by prayer for deliverance. We have to face the truth that God’s goal for our lives isn’t for us to be comfortable. God can deliver us from present circumstances and will ultimately deliver us from this broken world and make all things new (Rev. 21) but God asks us to do difficult things. He leads us, like Christ, into really difficult situations.
And [Jesus] said, "Abba, Father! All things are possible for you. Take this cup away from me. Nevertheless, not what I will, but what you will." Mark 14:36 CSB
We must pray for God’s help always and it is not wrong to ask to be delivered. He absolutely can remove ever obstacle in our path, but we must recognize the times when he does not and we, as human beings, can’t fully understand why. God did not take the cup from Christ Jesus and he also did not remove apostle Paul’s “thorn in the flesh” (2 Cor. 12:7). King David wrote, “though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” (Psalms 23:4; emphasis added). He didn’t write “though I look down into the valley of the shadow of death…” No, he was speaking from inside the valley.
We mustn’t come to fear difficult times. God is with us even in the darkest of places teaching us and showing us the way. In those times I pray, “God, what is it that is here for me to learn in this place which I hate? What are you showing me?”
Praying with a More Humble Heart
God is not a “genie in a bottle”. We can’t come to God’s throne in prayer so consumed by our agenda and what we want and how we believe everything should go our way. Go to God with honest emotion and for what it is you desire boldly (Hebrews 4:16), but don’t arrive and depart with pride and a selfish sense of entitlement. God never owed us anything and yet he gave us everything, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who wore our sin and died for us (1 Peter 2:24, Psalms 23:1).
Humility is not something to be ashamed of. We are limited human creatures God made. Our very humanity is our humility. We can’t do everything on our own. We were created to rely on God and also to ask people for help. We were made to love God and to love people and form relationships with both (Matt. 22:36-40). We forget the Kingdom of Heaven is us, we are a part of it. The Kingdom of Heaven is a family. Our family! We can ask fellow believers, our brothers and sisters, to pray for us on our behalf when we are struggling. Asking for help is difficult for the proud, but comes beautifully from the humble at heart.
We must submit ourselves, and what we pray for, humbly to God’s will for us and our lives. We must bow to God’s plan for us just as Jesus did in prayer. Praying for our desires also requires a surrendering of those desires just as Abraham offered up his only son to God. A son he had prayed for and waited for and believed God for (though Abraham did none of those things perfectly). Abraham submitted himself and his loved son at God’s command and without delay (Genesis 22).
Mankind, he has told each of you what is good and what it is the Lord requires of you: to act justly, to love faithfulness, and to walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8 CSB
Very powerful. Our journey is enriched with prayer.
May your prayer life grow without any pressure! Our Father is always listening! Love you!
Just got around to reading this and really enjoyed it! I would love to do a better job of asking people how I can pray for them. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for reading! I really appreciate it!